"Adam doesn't fit in."
I am a perpetual outcast. Until age 19 or so this was largely due to extreme social immaturity and high-level loserdom. Today I've come to realize that I'm sort of a scene-spanner.
In high school I was too keen while everyone else coasted. In university I was too blasé as everyone else was keen.
Too pragmatic for the intellectual scene. Too intellectual and introspective for the club scene. Too trusting to be in Toronto.
The bottom line is: people just don't get me, especially here.
I'm an individualistic person in a very cliquey city. I dance my ass of at the pick-up club. I'm too wordy, too thoughtful, and above all else, too honest.
Toronto I am so sorry that I refuse to play the game. To sit back and look disinterested. To never smile. I'm sorry that I tell people when I like them, that I'm honest about myself. I'm sorry I refuse to pursue someone all night, and instead just tell them they're cute. I'm sorry I'm real. I'm sorry that I thought that, just maybe, people might like a friend that's not exactly like them.
Oh wait, no I'm not. Fuck you Toronto.
Labels: Introspection, Partying, Toronto
J
Christ! The word verification:
vpvsyozexqry
Man I need a break now just entering that string in!
Good job man, keep being you! You rock!!
Wish I had the nerve to do that, but with guys like you out there, who wants to look at an old fart like me.
Ken
www.khudson.com/blog
Half a year later, I'm a little more jaded about this "tolerance."
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”-Theodore Geisel (Dr. Seuss)
Never apologize for that.
I am sooo looking forward to visiting you! You understand and accept me, and are just as uncool as I am (which in my opinion makes you super cool).
xoxo
m
Sounds like someone didn't have a good week.